Tired of everthing..

i very very long dint write diary.cny forst day i cryuntil like raining heavy.... my life so tough n im so tired of everything... if can i would like to end it.....  my sister run go sg.... is ok... but no message no phone... 1 or 2 month no news from her... maybe she really dun want this family d.. everytime i think im alone who facing or tge problem i really miss her.... eventhiugh she dint smsme but i really fan qian... i dun no why .... n this few day i realise my beloved bf chases girl... n i pretend dun no u know how pain am i.... he trying to delete all message n he though im silly... dun no everything... i try to solve the problem myself... really i really try it    i want take my sister responsibilty... but really hard n i very tired...... i havr to settle my bf thing n family... im so fed up...  my bf..  no moneyi ok.. i can py him.. really.. for me.. money is not a problem... i just wamt he loyelty to me... n treat me good.. but now im the want who love him. n treat him very nice.. every day.. wait him.. like silly girl.. today cny wait him until now 4am.. he promise me going to eat steamboat witg me...call me keep for him... but at the end he say after go his mum house will go back... but at the end.. u know he go where  ....  sing .. k.. im also ok... but sing until 4am without any message.. this is most sad thing... u know how silly am i... im waiting for him... keep everthing he love to eatm.. my mum call me keep it dun need wait him..  but i trust him...  i trust him..  he promise me n he will do it . but i wait until 4am.. get nothibg.. n keep all the thing again.. by myself.. or he go out with the girl until now??? hahaha... i dun no wat should i do u know.. who can teach me...